Lust, Caution

Meaning to writing this review ever since I saw it a couple of weeks ago...
It was first shown at the Toronto Film Fest with Tony Leung and the other actors coming, and we wasn't able to get the tix for it cause it was so much talked about...
so when it finally came out at the Vansity, I had to go see it...

This is one of the best films I have seen in quite a while and it made me believe in the power of movie again... how it is able to stir ppl's emotions, the power of story telling is superb, the acting is really really great, you can see so much depth and different levels from Tony Leung and also the new star Tang Wei...
Ang Lee was able to use the cinema language perfectly and so subtlety to tell a story that's so moving and touching, to reach into the depth of the soul to show how we are the same...

(Spoilers ahead...)

The story takes place in WWII when Japan was occupying parts of China and how a group of patriotic drama students decided to take matters into their own hands...
Wong Chi Chi(Tang Wei) found her calling in the drama club, as she is able to move audiences, and decided they had to use it for a purpose...kinda like "Heroes"
Their first target is Mr. Yee(Tony Leung), who is a traitor helping the Japanese ppl...closely guarded who won't go to any place that's dark and unknown..
So begins the task to seduce him...

There are a couple of key scenes, definite elements in the movie, one is when Wong takes the smoke from her friend's hands... the cigarette was first used during one of the scenes of acting and when she had decided to take up the role of Mrs. Mak, she took a cigarette by will and that's when the whole journey of "Acting" started...

In order to seduce Yee, Wong needed to learn some techniques, he had to lose her virginity for this "special training" as a big sacrifice and was looking helplessly to Lee Hong, whom Wong was in love with... but he just stood there without saying anything, as the only one from the group that knows how is a drunken bastard to learned his skills from some hookers...
There is a key scene where Wong just stood naked beside the window and looking outside... THis is very important, as it shows the state that Wong was in...
That the body is not really hers anymore and she is not afraid to show it, as she has already given it up as a tool for the "great cause"...it showed her determination...

But when they were notify that Yee had already left HK and went back to China, Wong broke down as she had lost her virginity for nothing and to a sick ugly little guy...and the group found how naive they were as their moves were watched by the underground gangs...so everyone needed to jet....

2 years passed and the chance came when Yee was spotted again and they can continue with their plan of assassination with the help of the rebels, Wong was more than happy to join in so she didn't sacrifice for nothing...

Sex Scenes

The sex scenes to me were there for a very good reason, as it showed Yee's insecurity as a person... through the body language and the face expressions, the state of the relationship between the two were easily uncovered...it showed how lonely Yee really is deep inside as he wasn't able to show it anywhere else... only when he is totally naked and vulnerable that he was able to be his true self...
In the very first "encounter", Wong was trying to play around with him and playing hard to get... Yee was very insecure and thought he was being rejected, so he got violent and beat Wong and kind of raped her...
In the sex scenes afterwards, Yee got a bit more relaxed but he never kissed Wong on the lips... cause that will be like giving out his real emotions... and it is not physical anymore...so it got more and more intense as they get more connected, not just physically, but by their body language...

There was a part where Wong had to meet Yee in a Geisha house...and ppl say that she was a disgrace to the Chinese as it was a place for Japanese to play with women and she went there willingly to be used by Yee...but just want to point out that the people who put her into the spot were the Chinese rebels... and she was doing it for the "good" of the country...not on her own will...

This is a great movie, great story telling with lots of hidden sentimental details...
which not alot of films can do nowadays... esp not with Hollywood anymore...
A must watch...
It is for mature adults of course....

We are helpless even in the face of facts and reality,
because we lack the ability to discern and reflect,
All we can do it to record.

The world without imagination...

"Violence is for those that has lost its imagination.
Has your country lost its imagination?"

This is from the manager of the hospital in Iraq,
where they had to care for hundreds and thousands of children, injuried men and women everyday, with pieces of missiles and metal fragments shot into the body...

It is because of the lack of imagination that the world has gone bad...
we always get into arguments and fights with others,
cause in the post modern, our feelings and stand point is very important, and it is our rights...
and so when ppl don't agree on things, the easiest way is just to see who is the stronger one and beat the heck out of the other till u have to surrender...
When parents dealing with their kids, when couples argues, when kids get into fights in school, cause they didn't see other ways to deal with it, so just start to shout and yell and shoot...


We only see others as an material object, an other, an "it", a number, a stat,
and don't look into ppl...
that they are actually a person with feelings, with their loved ones crying and worrying for them when things happens...

This is why a culture, arts, literature are so important...
to understand humanity,
with flesh and blood, thoughts and feelings...

When are we going to learn...

Shrine Circus

Haven't been to a circus for a while, the last time was like 2 years ago to the Circus De Soule...
Just went to one of those very old traditional circus on the weekend,
one of those that are in the parking lots of a mall.
So I didn't really have many expectations for it,
as it is not really those "artsy" type circus where the focus is on the music and performance.

This one is really raw and traditional...
with a lot of kids there, riding on elephants, face paints, cotton candy,
horses, dogs doing different tricks...
some of the acts were really great to my surprise..
like shooting anchor at the small apple on top of someone's head...
or the elephants acts...really great to my surprise...

Then I realized that we really needed more of these attractions around us,
even though it is small, or not really "professional" to today's standards,
But it is very important as it inspires kids to actually dream,
stir their imagination, giving them the sense of mystery magic...
which is lost to the children of today... without the true sense of what childhood should be like...
as they are mostly in front of the TV, video games...
and the circus actually let they really be there to see and experience these magical trick...
I hear one of the kids said to her parents as they leave after the show...
That she wants to be in the circus when she grows up...
Well...even though we all know her chance of helping a circus is very slim...
but I think it is very beautiful to see a dream was dreamt at that exact moment...

Acting/Directing Class Part II

Finish the directing class a week or two ago...
For this term, it was even harder than last term...
Last term we had to learn to act, having to anayalses the script, personalize who each of the character is to you in real life...
It is very very hard work...
because sometimes you had to go to really deep and dark places of yourself that no one knows about...

I had to play a killer in "Get Carter" who this professional actor...
Then I had to ask myself, in what situation will I really kill someone in real life?
Cause if i don't get this clear, I will only be "playing" an emotion or action, which is the worst acting EVER....
and ppl who knows how to act can tell in an instant that you are faking it...
So I had to picture the ppl who are closest to me, my gf, my family, my best friend...
what will I do if they were killed and murdered and I had to get revenge for them??
Will I kill then? and that's not enough...
I had to even picture how they die... maybe got beaten to death? killed by drunken driving? the body got all cut up?
The emotions that was in you on your way to see the body? How did it look when you first see their body...
the deeper and more detail u pictured it to be, the more real and intense the emotions will be...

Also the bigger the stake are, the better...cause there will be way more conflict in the scene...
I had to do an activity where I had to picture myself to be preparing for an Across fundraising dinner...
and lots of guests were coming...and these gifts...the set of magnets were not sorted out yet...
and if i don't sort out all of them and put them in a set of 8 in a gift envelope in like 10 minutes,
The donors will not give any more funding to Across and we had to close down...
So I gone crazy doing it...
(even though there is no way to do it, and that's the point of the activity and I cannot leave this activity no matter what)
and then a classmate, whom is suppose to play my gf's best friend...
just come in and tell me that she just got into a car accident and is in the hositpal now...
I have to go immediately....
So the big big conflict and tension was created... as to what am I to choose...

Even though it is pretty painful sometimes to do these things, getting the emotions out is really tiring...
and sometimes tears comes out and the negative feelings stay with u for a while...
it shows me how much work a REAL actor needs to do and lots of respect for them...
and I am also thankful that I have lots of life experiences that I can use to fuse the emotions if I needed...

Test the age of your brain

This is a very great game...
Lucky that i am not that old and my brain is still working...
It is pretty funny that when u try to do it...
u can just visualize a line/path for the numbers...
try it...

http://www.excite.co.jp/world/english/web/?wb_url=http%3A%2F%2Fflashfabrica.com%2F&wb_lp=JAEN&wb_dis=2

Another very good friend is going to leave for HK....again...
I have known Jacky ever since high school...
He is one of the rare rare friends that I have that I will call when I am most down and he will be there for me...
used to have afternoon tea with him and his sister and "black ghost" everyday after school...
we don't really do much at that time, but just hang out together all the time, and watch lots of Jap movies, concerts, and lots and lots of comics together... and used to play PS till very late at night...
We were so naive at that time, not that much wants in life, just let life passby as it comes...
Which I never get another chance to have days like that again...
Then me, Jacky and my brother all took part-time in the book store on the weekends, it would be really fun,
as it doesn't really seem like real work and all we do was hang around the malls
and read books during the office hours...
Then as we get more busier in life, got more distanced and less contacts...
But at the farewell dinner that night, when we talk about our "good old days" again,
the friendship is still like the same as yesterday...

Will miss you...
Hope you will do well and find what you are looking for in HK...

"Never doubt that a small group of committed people can CHANGE THE WORLD. Indeed, it is the only thing that every did"
~Margaret Mead

I am through with the past,
but the past is not through with me.

~ Magnolia

Urbana Day 1

Didn't really have much expectation before going to Urbana...
I thought that it was to open my eyes and make a bit more clear as what i am to do...
as i always thought i already found my path and general direction to be doing film stuff or youth stuff...
So i thought it was to go to relax...as was pretty busy before with recording and other meetings...
i even brought two books with me to read...
And so i thought...

We carpooled to Buffalo airport and took the train to Chicago first...then transfer to St.Louis...
the train ride was really great and comforty... cause the seats were really huge...
there was even a observation deck to look out into the wheat fields...
gave me great time to relax and prepare for going into Urbana...
except that we can't really find any food to eat, cause it was Christmas Day and Boxing Day,
not that many resturants opened...

It was late at nite in the train and wasn't able to sleep...
so was talking to Yum about how we each came to know Christ...
and then she suddenly asked me if i have made up with God yet...
i was thinking in my heart...hmmm....what a silly question...
of course i did...
why do u even need to ask??

But then after thinking about it for a while,
I found that maybe i haven't...
After i left church for a couple of years...
and came to Across and back to church...
i wanted to filled lots of info and knowledge about Christians...
kinda to make up for the years that i missed...
but it never really went into my heart...
and i guess i know the Holy Spirit speaks to me and guide me...
but didn't really think there is really a spiritual battle...
so that's why lots of the times, i depended only on myself...

And i guess i always feel that i did lots of bad things in the past and hurted lots of ppl...
never really let myself go and forgave myself...
so there was always this distance.... with myself or with the big G...

So it was really great to have this reflection before getting to Urbana and it set the tone and objective for the whole thing...
to truly experierence God into my heart...to really see Him again...